Wayne the excessively hygenic toilet plunger...

Once there was a little toilet plunger named Wayne. Wayne liked everything neat and tidy. Wayne was known in school for his exquisitely clean desk and he always had neat handwriting. Wayne did not like messes or clutter in any shape or form. Wayne washed his hands seventeen times a day. This was somewhat extreme but he was after all, excessively hygenic.

On the day of graduation, Wayne was excited to find out what his new career was going to be. "Perhaps I'll be a NASA rocket engineer" he thought. "Or maybe, just maybe...I'll even work for...Mr. Clean." Mr. Clean is after all the most famous of all cleaning personnel and the idol of every excessively hygenic person, or in this case a small toilet plunger.

Wayne reported to his first day of work. "Plu...m...ber" He read. "I wonder what sort of exciting job that is?" he thought. He entered the big room and looked around wide eyed. There in front of him were several other tools, about whose exciting jobs he could only speculate.

Wayne read over his job description, which came as quite a shock. "You...want me to...what?" He asked in disbelief. "There's no way...aaaaaugh!" With a sweeping motion, the large plumber picked Wayne up and began to plunge a nearby toilet. "Bubble, bubble, bubble...AAAAAHHH, STOP...bubble, bubble, bubble...THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!" Wayne screamed as he gasped for breath. "Bubble, bubble, bubble...GERMS EVERYWHERE! ...bubble, bubble...FOR THE LOVE OF! ...bubble, bubble, bubble...WHY IN THE NAME OF! ...bubble, gasp...I THINK I'M GOING TO! ..."

And so it went. The plunging, the unclogging...THE HORROR! Little Wayne never had a chance. He eventually passed out and never regained consciousness. Seeing Wayne's expiration, the plunger smiled a wicked smile and placed him on the rack marked, "FOR SALE".

So next time you walk down the plunger aisle at your local hardware store, pour a little Drain-o out on the curb in remembrance of little Wayne.

The end.